Like many other men, Ray Dawkins has no intention of getting married. Unfortunately for Ray, he meets the beautiful Barbie Crawford, and falls in love with her.

After the death of his older brother, Guiseppe "the guppy" Calzone becomes head of the Calzone Mob family. His aging father knows his son is not cut out for the job, so he sends him to "Mafia University". The head of a rival Mafia Family sees this as an opportunity to strike and bring the Calzone Family to its knees. Surrounded by danger, double-crossing and pasta.