A vampire scientist psychically charges the "longevity serum" he sells across the world, making all who use it into vampires loyal to him.

School nerd Bill just wants to save the world and to score a date with cheerleader babe Chrissie Schackler. Both become real possibilities when he finds an alcoholic Leprechaun in a beer bottle he was about to recycle. Wacky hijinks ensue as the leprechaun, Lepkey, messes up a few of the wishes. Can Bill fight off school jock Tony Chanuka and marry Chrissie so they can fulfill their dream of opening a clinic?